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【公益课音频】沉默老师:谈谈宠爱与溺爱
2015-12-21浏览2761收藏0
如何看待溺爱与宠爱?我们是在满足孩子还是满足我们自己?



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国家二级心理咨询师,绘画心理技术导师,意象对话咨询师,呼和浩特市红树林心理咨询中心负责人,内蒙古心理咨询师协会会员,内蒙古呼和浩特市妇联家庭教育研究会讲师,北京宽高教育集团心灵成长家长课堂讲师,中国关心下一代工作委员会特聘家庭教育专家,被呼和浩特市妇联评为2015年度家庭教育先进个人。

系统学习过精神分析、绘画心理技术、意象对话、叙事治疗、焦点短期心理咨询、沙盘游戏治疗等心理知识和技能的学习。擅长婚恋、青少年心理和亲子关系咨询。

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希望大家都能进来帮助一下我,太心疼妈妈了,整天替我学习担心,妈妈嘴上不说,但我了解妈妈的心我是一名即将高三文科生,以前因为年纪小,贪玩,对学习很反感,以至于我只考上了一个很普通的高中。在高中里,高一也是浑浑噩噩的度过。我们高一升高二开始分了重点班和普通班,没有悬念的,我进入了普通班,将近半个班的同学都是艺术生。当我把这个消息告诉我妈妈时候,我看出妈妈眼神里流露出了失落的神情,可是她的脸上还是带着微笑,对我说:没关系,在普通班也可以把那些重点班的学生比下去。
就因为妈妈这句话,我高二很努力的学习,数学成绩从9分到了85分(满分150),英语和语文都在100分左右(满分150),把将近一半得重点班得学生挤在我之下,都可是我知道这远远不够,因为我们学校不怎么好,每年高考能上一本院校的几乎都是艺术生,真正是高考分数上一本的人一只手都能数得清楚。高二下学期即将结束了,再开学我就高三了,看着妈妈整天面对电脑,就是为了更了解有关高考的一切,以便到我高考时给我更好的环境和心态。看到妈妈这样我真的很心疼,恨自己怎么那么不长进。
今年的高考成绩出来,我们这边(广西)的文科一本线是510。在学校上课,几乎每节课老师刚上讲台就跟我讲高考分数的事情,压得我很喘不过气。
我们班主任在班上给我们分析高考分数的时候说:一本我们就不要去想那么多,我们来看看二本分数。这句话让我很不服,凭什么我们就不能去想一本?就因为是普通学校?就因为在普通班里?
我现在真的很迷茫,不知道应该把自己的位置摆放在哪里。是乖乖听老师的考二本(因为老师说过我继续努力下去是有希望上二本的)?还是把目标订在一本?我害怕我自己把目标订在一本是太高估我自己的实力,因为我本身基础就不是太好,我该怎么办?
为了妈妈报答妈妈,我真的不怕吃苦,可就是学习时候找不到头绪,不懂如何去学习。就像数学,练习我是做得很多,但是分数都没有很大的上升。其实我有一种感觉,如果考试的题目是在我平常得练习中出现,我就会做,可是当这些题目搬上了试卷,我解题就开始有障碍了。考完试我再做这些题目,基本上都能解出来,但是就考试时候脑子一片空白,不知如何下手。
准备暑假了,我希望能得到老师的指点,然后在暑假里把我的问题逐个击破,能更好的迎接高三的到来,让我的妈妈不管是从眼神或表情上都能感到欣慰,为我感到骄傲。
希望看到我这篇求助的人,不管是老师,家长或者同学,都能给我些意见,我真的感激不尽!
如何解决孩子的当前状态?尊敬的王老师:
您好,我是河北唐山的孩子家长,有一个上初一的女儿,孩子小学成绩还好,在班级总是前十名,我们给她选了一的比较好的中学,因为没有关系没有进入快班,上学期期中、期末的成绩分别考了594分和592分(满分700分),数学成绩急剧下滑,期末数学只考了74分,我们做家长的道理给她讲了,她也给自己定了学习计划,可是成绩没有明显的提高,我也与她的老师沟通过了,几位科任老师都反映听讲状态不好,我甚至于想到了给她转班。
急切盼望王老师给家长和孩子指导和帮助。
谢谢
您好! 您的回答我非常感谢!造成原因有三种:1由于家长要求比较要严格,教育方式比较过激,给孩子造成很大的心理压力。2.由于是住宿,孩子不能适应学校的管理,厌烦去学校.3.孩子不能够理解家长和老师讲的道理.沟通比较慢.
对于您说的宽高,我想问一下是学校吗?什么性质的.对于我的孩子有什么帮助?要去的话是不是要事先联系,找谁联系?
非常感谢!!盼尽快回复.
我是一位中差生。你好,我现在是初三的学生,但是我觉得学习都不怎么能赶得上,我老是问来问去都是这几个问题,不知道是我做出好的效果还是做得不对,我记得初二我也和你们的网上老是也谈过我的学习问题,他也一一给我分析原因,但是我根本都不出好的效果,总是找不出自已缺的那个不好的地方,我现在感觉到非常不好,因为就要中考了,我真的不知道怎么样。如果你有联系QQ的话最好加一下我。QQ:10274696


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